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"I," she would say, her eyes as wide as a dope addict's eyes, and she metes out this sentence slowly, each word louder than the other, "was nothing but a doormat for your father." valentine By the time she gets to father, she is howling, and the "a" in father is a long, long howling a, the vowel of someone who has her leg caught in a trap. Some time after I was ten and in the fifth valentine grade, I began to make myself invisible to others. I skulked. I said to myself valentine that I was a wallflower and I clung, therefore, to walls. I began more and more to hide myself from myself. I dug down further. I was tired of trying—to get and stay thin, to get along with Mama. At school, I hadn't liked not being chosen for teams. I hadn't liked not being invited to birthday parties. I hadn't liked it that almost no one wanted to sit next to me at the lunch table.
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